Summer Is Ending

As I sit here and write this title, I feel very sad. To be honest, I hate when summer ends, I wish it could go on forever. It is my favourite season and the only time all year I really feel connected to nature and I do not have to worry about the daily household schedule and being on time for this and that.

 This summer has provided some much needed distraction and rest for my son and I. We have been up at our cottage enjoying time away from the city and just embracing the outdoors. We always have plans to do certain activities in the summer and sometimes we do them all and sometimes we do not. This summer is no different. I used to get anxious if all that was planned did not happen, but I am not that way anymore. I am just happy to do nothing.

 My son is my absolute favorite person to hang out with. We can lay on the dock, listen to music, go swimming, boating and lots of other things and there is just pure happiness. I know everyone does not see in him what I do, and that is perfectly okay. Sometimes when others think of autism, they always talk about the struggles and the hardships (which are very real). But I also enjoy the carefree times when life in general just does not put so much pressure on people with autism to mold or fit or even perform for that matter. It is nice to have no expectations sometimes.

 As we look forward to returning home and getting ready for the fall activities and school, I am extremely grateful to have had time this summer with my son. My daughter and my husband are just as important but I do not get to spend as much time with them, unfortunately. Our cottage is such a special place and I hate to leave it, but I know that God wants us to have rest and restoration, which is why he created the earth in 6 days and rested on the 7th day.

 Being in nature for all of us is important but especially for those on the spectrum as they have a special connection with nature, if that makes sense. If you know, you know.

 In Hebrews 4:10 it states, 

“for anyone who enters God’s rest also rests from their works, 
just as God did from his.”

 As we move into Fall and all the new things that our children will experience, let us look to God for strength and peace to be able to handle all that will transpire. 

May God bless each and every one of your families and always remember that God is in control of everything. He sees everything, He knows our children and He will protect and guide us all. We just need to ask Him. 

I look forward to seeing everyone very soon! God bless!

Shelly Wedge
Exceptional Family Ministries Coordinator
Amberlea Church

“The more things change, the more they stay the same.”

 Have you ever heard this expression before? This expression can mean different things to different people. 

 I think of this expression sometimes in terms of my children. Raising children on the autism spectrum, things are constantly changing - sometimes multiple times in a day or even an hour!

 People with autism like ”the sameness of things”. They like routine and structure. They like knowing what is happening next so that they can mentally plan for it. Lots of people with autism function really well with a visual schedule of what they are doing, especially at school. Unfortunately, the world does not work this way. Our world is very fast-paced and busy. We go from one place to the next or one thing to the next without blinking an eye. Sometimes, I feel like I’m on autopilot.

 Children with autism grow into teenagers and teenagers into young adults. They learn strategies of how to live and cope in our busy world, but they also need to have things that they are totally in control of. For example, there may be 10 different things that happened today that could be different than yesterday, but when your child comes home to the “sameness” and the control that they have over this environment, it brings them comfort and reduces anxiety.

 Things have changed in our household because our children have grown and changed over time. Although they do have constants in their life such as family, home, cottage and even simple things like bedtimes and eating times.

 Both of our children have grown and learned so many things over the years. But they love their constants like being at home. They feel safe and secure and know they can be themselves and not judged by the world.

 If we have God in our lives, we always have a constant. God is a constant source of comfort, compassion, kindness and love. We can always count on Him - always. No matter what changes, He remains the same - for everyone. That’s the great thing. He created you and loves you just as you are as we are all made in God’s image.

 In 2 Corinthians 1:3 it says,  

“Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ,
the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort,
who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves receive from God”.

 If you are a special needs parent or just someone struggling with other issues, remember you are important to God and He will always be there for you. That’s a promise! God will always be the same.

 Shelly Wedge
Exceptional Family Ministries Coordinator
Amberlea Church

Summertime, Funtime

Summertime is a great time for those on the spectrum to enjoy some fun!  Working hard all year, all kids look forward to a break from school and a bit of a new routine for the summer months.

 For those on the spectrum, this can be good and bad. Structure is good, so trying to create structure in the summer is very important. Personally, I always feel like a total break is a good thing. This is what worked well for our family. I think every family has things that work for them, but one thing is for sure is that summer is a time when you can have experiences that you can’t normally have during the year. For other people, they need to have total structure to keep their child feeling some sense of normalcy. This is good as well. Perhaps the activities are just a little different than during the school year.

 Families take vacations or go to outdoor parks to enjoy the weather. I remember back in the early years, I was obsessed with structuring the summer. I would make structured plans and most of the time they didn’t work out. What I realized over time was that our kids needed a break just as much as we did. Once I decided to relax and just be in the moments that we were having, no matter what we were doing, the summer became such a lovely time. Sometimes not talking is just as important as talking. I have definitely embraced this.

 We are extremely blessed as we have a cottage to spend time at in the summer. This has come to be a refuge for us, a relaxing place, a time for renewal and fun. There are no time limits, no expectations, no rushing around - it’s heavenly.

 Yesterday, we went paddle boarding and just kind of hung out at our dock. Since we’ve been up at the cottage, we’ve just been hanging out and not doing anything in particular, which is such an amazing thing to be able to do. Even our dog is relaxing and enjoying the sunshine!

“Come to me,
all you who are weary and burdened
and I will give you rest”.
Matthew 11:28

God wants us to rest and reflect - no matter what that looks like for you and your family. We all need rest and restoration. We all need to reflect on God's goodness in the world and in nature. 

 I truly wish all parents of special needs children are able to relax and reflect with their children. I hope you enjoy your time together and most of all I wish God’s blessing on all of you.

 Enjoy the rest! Enjoy the summer!

Shelly Wedge
Exceptional Family Ministries Coordinator
Amberlea Church