COVID Confusion

There is no doubt that COVID-19 has been tough and rough on everyone. It has affected people in many different ways. For someone with autism who functions on routine for security and peace in their life it has been especially hard to wrap their heads around outward forces that they cannot control and to some degree may not fully comprehend.

First it was stay at home, and for some that meant not going to school anymore or a change to their school structure. Doing school at home for someone with autism has its own challenges. For example, a smaller child may not be able to engage with a teacher on the computer. For an older child it may be trying to pay attention and sit still and be engaged for a full hour lecture. It simply was difficult for everyone to manage and adjust and then keep adjusting as things kept changing. This in itself is torture for those on the spectrum.

For all of us, it meant not going to church in person, but instead watching it online. For the most part kids don’t do great at this -- well at least those on the spectrum. So, church had become very foreign to them. As a parent of teens on the spectrum, I tried to engage my children in this but sadly it did not work out very well. With all of the other changes we were dealing with, this one was extremely difficult.

Now we are back to the church building – hooray!!! So, it’s time to get back to our church routine. But, let’s face it, it’s been over 2 years and it’s a HUGE adjustment going back to the building – for everyone.

My son, who is on the spectrum, and I went into the building on a Friday after school. I told him that we were going to be going back to church on Sunday and we had to set up the sensory room for Sunday morning and move some things around as some things had been in storage for a while.  As we were about to enter the building, he stopped and said, “No, it’s COVID-19!” It was such a shocking reaction for me to witness but this was how he felt and he was worried. I told him that it was okay and that yes there is still Covid around but that we were going to be safe just like at school. He then came into the building and we proceeded to do what we needed to do.

For another younger child, coming back into the church building was a different experience. It was forgetting the routine and structure of church and what we do when we are at there. These are big adjustments and need to be eased into slowly.

It takes time as it is very confusing on different levels for different individuals.

For me, observing their reactions, it opens my eyes. I try to put myself in the other person’s shoes as to how this must feel for them. I try to do things to make it easier for them to adjust and be able to learn about Jesus, as this is our goal. We want to support individuals with autism and we want them to be part of our Amberlea Church community.

I am so grateful for Amberlea for having an Exceptional Family Ministries program and I feel honoured to be a part of it. I am looking forward to reaching out to more families in our community and watching our little seedling grow! (Thought I would throw that is as it is spring time!)

I love the verses that say,

“Children are a gift from the Lord; they are a reward from him.” Psalm 127:3

“Jesus said ‘Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these.’“  Matthew 19:14

We are blessed by all children and can learn something from each and every one of them!

We look forward to welcoming all families at church!

Shelly Wedge

Exceptional Family Ministry Coordinator

Amberlea Church

Photo by Kelly Sikkema on Unsplash

Remembering………

As a parent of two exceptional individuals, I remember many challenges that we faced over time.  It started out with the diagnosis, the tears, the misunderstandings, the whys?

I remember all the hours of research, wondering, hoping, praying, not knowing who to talk to, where to go for help - all of the tears that we both experienced.

I remember the financial strain, the people who helped us and all of the hard work that we had to do and continue to do as a family to understand how to move forward effectively for the sake of our child.

I remember all of the teachers I had to communicate with, some good and helpful, and some who didn’t care.

I remember crawling into bed at night so mentally and emotionally exhausted that I didn’t know how I was going to make it another day.

I remember some people whispering, looking at my child making comments and how much it hurt me.

I remember some really tough behaviours that we had to deal with and work through.

I remember all of the amazing people that I met along this crazy journey and how they supported our family, helped us, educated us and were by our side day in and day out.

I remember the love, the kindness, the joy that we experienced when an achievement was made. It was so exciting!

Most of all, I always remember how much God loved us – our family. Even when I didn’t understand, I knew that God was there.

If you are a parent with an exceptional child, you know where I am coming from. There are so many things to face every day that it can be so overwhelming. You may wonder how you are going to make it through the day. You may want to give up. Whatever feelings you may experience are yours and need to be validated.

I want to tell you that God loves you and your family. He is there for you at your lowest low and your highest high. He will never leave you. I have learned over the years that God is the one constant and He has never let me down -ever.

I love the verse from Isaiah 54:10, “Though the mountains be shaken and the hills removed, yet my unfailing love for you will not be shaken nor my covenant of peace be removed,” said the Lord who has compassion on you.”

When you are feeling as though perhaps you can’t go on, remember how much God loves you and cares for you. We at Amberlea Church also love you and care about you.

Here at Amberlea we will be opening our doors once again to our exceptional needs program in the coming weeks and would love to have you and your family join us on Sunday mornings!

Shelly Wedge

Exceptional Families Coordinator

Amberlea Church

We All Need a Break!

So as I am writing this, we have just finished our March Break.  In our house, I feel that we all needed this break. It’s nice to have a break from the usual routine in our lives so that we can rest and rejuvenate our mind, body and souls.

Since we are still technically in Covid times, our goal this March Break was just to have fun and build our relationships by doing fun, no pressure activities. I am happy to say that we happily achieved this goal!

We went to the ROM, Ripley’s Aquarium, Sky Zone, went for a hike, did some therapeutic shopping, watched movies and did some Lego and crafts around the house and took a couple of naps. It was perfect!  It was just what we needed. It was nice not to have pressure to be anywhere or do anything, no pressure for school drop-offs and pick-ups.  There were no appointments to go to either which was so very nice. Sometimes when you are trying to plan activities for kids/teens on the spectrum it can be difficult because there are so many more things that you have to consider, like crowds, noise level, interests and time. Sometimes it can be hard for a person with autism to focus for a longer period of time.

When I look at where our son especially is on his journey now and back to when he was younger, I sometimes can’t believe how much he has matured, changed and adapted. He is doing things now that I never ever dreamed he would. But more importantly, I just love hanging out with him! I feel that it is important to enjoy your special needs child right where they are at in the moment.

Our lives always seem to have so much hustle and bustle to them. We are always coming and going and when we are home, we are thinking about the million things that we have to get done. Sometimes, I go to bed at night and I literally cannot shut off my brain. But this week was a good reminder that rest is so very important. It is also important to connect with our children. Although both of my teenagers have autism, I find ways to connect with each of them differently and I try to make these connections meaningful. They both enjoy doing different activities which is fine because I enjoy spending time with both of them. I have learned so much from each of them. During this March Break our daughter actually instructed a painting class for myself and one of my close friends and it was so relaxing and nice to see her in her element. She is so talented and smart and I learn so much from her.

“By the seventh day God had finished the work he had been doing; so on the seventh day he rested from all his work. Then God blessed the seventh day and made it holy, because on it he rested from all the work of creating that he had done.” Genesis 2:2-3

When I think about this week, it brings me back to when God created the world and on the seventh day He rested. When I was younger, places of business were rarely open on Sundays. It was the day of rest and things were closed down. In many ways, I miss these times because I feel that it forced people to slow down.  Sunday was sacred and time that you spent with God and your family.

Although, we don’t have this today, it doesn’t mean that we can’t slow down. We just have to be more purposeful about it. This has been harder to do with Covid restrictions but since these seem to be coming to an end, we certainly hope that things will get back to a new kind of normal. Taking time to focus on God and family is one of the best things that we can do.

Matthew 11:28 “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.”

Trust in God, He will never let you down.

Shelly Wedge

Exceptional Families Coordinator

Amberlea Church

Photo by tristin zeman on Unsplash