So recently I found myself in a rather uncomfortable and emotionally unsettling situation with a woman that I just met. We were having a pleasant enough encounter when something I said greatly offended her. I was surprised by her reaction and immediately apologized. She, however was not at all interested in accepting my apology and continued to berate me.

What do you do when someone is unwilling to forgive or is just plain difficult?

Maybe it’s the in-law that is constantly critiquing your parenting skills or offering “suggestions” for improvement. Or the child that knows “everything”, particularly how to jump on your last nerve. Perhaps it’s the co-worker who is willing to do whatever it takes to get ahead including sabotaging you. Or the passive aggressive friend who is loving one moment and gives you the cold shoulder the next. The list can go on and on.

What do you do?

My natural tendency is to want to run in the other direction, or avoid them as much as possible. But is that what honours God?

In Luke 6:27-29, Jesus describes things difficult people might do: “But to you who are listening I say: Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you. If someone slaps you on one cheek, turn to them the other also. If someone takes your coat, do not withhold your shirt from them.”

And then in the next few verses, Jesus offers three radical ways to respond.

1. Give extravagantly.

“Give to everyone who asks you, and if anyone takes what belongs to you, do not demand it back.” (Luke 6:30, NIV)

Our first step is to become acutely aware that Jesus loves us right where we are. He loves us when we’re prickly. He loves us when we fail to think before we speak. As hard as it is to understand, we don’t always deserve a loving response, but our Heavenly Father gives it in generous measure.

Being loved by Jesus allows us to love others. We are free to give a measure of mercy, even as we work through conflict to resolve differences.

2. Treat them the way you want to be treated.

“Do to others as you would have them do to you.” (Luke 6:31, NIV)

When we treat others the way we want to be treated, we give up the need to control them or the situation. We stop looking for flaws, as we realize how deeply flawed we are as well. We hold back verbal karate chops, choosing words that heal rather than heat up the situation, because that’s exactly what we’d desire if the tables were turned.

3. Love unexpectedly.

“If you love those who love you, what credit is that to you? Even sinners love those who love them.” (Luke 6:32, NIV)

Loving difficult people is the hard path of faith, but it’s also where God’s greatest work begins — in our own heart. Revenge or retaliation, as good as it might feel in the moment doesn’t make us stronger, quite the contrary. It is in loving that person and trying to find peace that makes us stronger.

So we love. WE love those who don’t love us back. WE love those who are difficult. WE love those who don’t and will never see eye to eye with us, not because it is easy, it’s not, but because that is who we are.

And they will know we are Christians by our love.

Join us this Sunday in person at Amberlea Church, 1820 Whites Rd., Pickering ON (please register) or online Amberlea Church YouTube

as we continue our series entitled:

Finding the Missing Peace.